A few days later, it was time to see what all the fizzing was about: Jumbleberry Freezer Surprise wine was definitely working--and smelling--great.

Note: I'm not a doctor. I don't even pretend to be one to pick up women anymore. I can't give medical advice, remove a sliver, take aspirin without a consulting physician, or even stand that ‘House' show (he's mean). Information provided below is strictly for informational purposes and makes no claim to health improvement, fresher breath, or whiter whites and should not be construed as medical advice, on the pain of having a lawyer mortgage my firstborn.

I give a lot of presentations to home winemakers. I like doing it for a variety of reasons: folks who make their own wines are universally nice and I like helping them out, I enjoy interacting with people who are actually using my products and thinking about them, plus of course I can't get enough of the sound of my own voice pontificating on the subject that interests me most. What's not to love?

With amazing regularity, approximately once per consumer lecture, I get told a specific anecdote. Someone will stand up during the question period and say, "I can drink my homemade wine and never suffer a problem, but as soon as I drink commercial wine, I get a terrific headache/stuffy nose/allergic reaction/hypotension/palpitations/flushing/edema/ black plague/nuisance phone calls, etc, etc. Why is that?"